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Saturday 30 July 2011

Cool Kids @ the Good Ship, Kilburn

Once upon a time, there was a dark Celtic track that joined the settlements of Canterbury and St Albans. Later, that dark Celtic track became a paved Roman road, and was given the name Watling Street. Augustinian nuns named the community they inherited Kilburn, and it became fashionable to take tea and medicinal waters in the area as London gradually urbanised.


Now, down the Kilburn High Street, amongst the Irish pubs and Somali bazaars, not far from the red brick Kilburn Park Tube, lies the Good Ship. It's owned by this guy here, who told Tom off by email, warning him that he was in danger of letting the 'entire night' down if he didn't respond.

 
John McCooke, who told Tom off
What night? Friday 5 August of course, when Scandinavia are joining three other bands on stage to rock the fukk out and make the cool kids @ the Good Ship pee their pants with excitement. Are you cool enough to pee your pants in public and not give a total fukk?  
Cool Kids @ The Good Ship

Monday 11 July 2011

A Tale of Two Festivals: Life’s rich pageant.

A Tale of Two Festivals: Life’s rich pageant.



Roger Scruton, cultural restorationist and stalwart of the new right (pictured) appeared at the Ideas of Nature and Countryside Festival in Malmesbury, Wiltshire at the weekend.  Central to Scruton’s ideal of the British countryside are its grand buildings like Knebworth House, whose balanced architecture ‘liberates us from the tyranny of the useful’, ‘satisfies our need for harmony’ and ‘reminds us of our spiritual and moral needs’.  


Music, he believes, has a similar function to architecture:

 ‘Music soothes, cheers, pacifies; it speaks of another order of being....It is this very
order that is threatened by the monsters of popular culture’.

This is for you, Rog-  a look at what happened in the grounds of Knebworth at the weekend!

Seriously though. Whether we align ourselves with Scruton or with Slayer, we can surely all share in lamenting the continued existence of Limp Bizkit, who played to a crowd of 80,000 at Sonisphere last night.

Thursday 7 July 2011

NOTW and NKOTB to form media conglomerate





Whenever I see the acronym NOTW I think of when New Kids on the Block became NKOTB in a bid to be taken more seriously. So, the astonishing news that NTOW will be no more reminded me of the trauma I experienced when NKOTB finally called it a day.

I'm also struck by how compatible the two are - NOTW and NKOTB is the best merger never considered. Think about it:


both have the best interests of children at heart

the Page 3 girl should really be the Cover Girl

NKOTB could teach NOTW a few things about Hangin' Tough when the going gets that way

NKOTB would be unbelievably good if they made Mick Hucknall their frontman

There would be some difficult changes along the way, but both companies have got The Right Stuff and if they just take it Step-by-Step I'm sure this would be the greatest media conglomerate of all time.

Wednesday 6 July 2011

Our favourite loud braggart

Everyone should know that the greatest Beach Boy is Mike Love. Not only is he the only one left standing but he also wrote the Beach Boys' best song - Kokomo.

In anticipation of Tom's forthcoming 'In Defence of Mike Love' (for not everyone loves the Love), here's something to whet your appetite - a montage of Mike's lung-bursting intro to 'Be True to Your School'.

Lyrics are below - NB, Mike is only singing the first word for the full 5 minutes of this video.



Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen!
Some loud braggart tries to put me down
And says his school is great
I tell him right away
"Now what's the matter buddy
Ain't you heard of my school
It's number one in the state"

So be true to your school now
Just like you would to your girl or guy
Be true to your school now
And let your colors fly
Be true to your school

I got a letterman's sweater
With a letter in front
I got for football and track
I'm proud to wear it now
When I cruise around
The other parts of the town
I got a decal in back

So be true to your school now
Just like you would to your girl or guy
Be true to your school now
And let your colors fly
Be true to your school

On Friday we'll be jacked up on the football game
And I'll be ready to fight
We're gonna smash 'em now
My girl will be working on her pom-poms now
And she'll be yelling tonight

So be true to your school now
Just like you would to your girl or guy
Be true to your school now
And let your colors fly
Be true to your school

Rah rah rah Be true to your school
Rah rah rah Be true to your school
Rah rah rah Be true to your school
Rah rah rah Be true to your school

Sunday 3 July 2011

'Le Tenniz de Jean McEnroe est superbe'

Like Lars Ulrich, McEnroe must've been born Scandinavian but became Americanised when is parents moved him over the pond so he could get good at tennis.

You cannot vote this unScandinavian because it is, absolutely, the essence of Scandinavia:


They should definitely make a movie about him and get John C Reilly to play McEnroe - he would get an Oscar for it. Will Ferrell could play a series of different umpires.

EXCLUSIVE: Scandinavia Discusses Tracklisting for 'Good Living'

RE: about Tom's tracklisting.

From:

Nadoom (xxxxx@hotmail.com)

Sent:

07 May 2011 10:11:53

To:

Waz; Parky; Tibs

Yo - Here are my thoughts on track listing, attempting to reconcile musical effect with the lyrical/quasi-narrative album journey. Scandinavia IS a concept band, so it is important to bear the latter in mind.

This is what you suggested:

Foxy

Gap Year

Good Living

K Fed

Case of the Kicked-in Door

Nondescript American Accent

Stuck in the 90s
The Blindman

Clarkson

I killed Yr Lover (not so secret track)

My gut says that Stuck in the 90s is mos def not an opener. It is has a penultimate feeling. Lyrically, it's nostalgic- a 'looking back'. You shouldn't look back before you've started. It's also the most autobiographical in spirit, so seems too much like a retro mission statement for the album.

Here is my track listing:

Good Living
Nondescript American Accent
Foxy

Gap Year

K Fed

Case of the Kicked-in Door

Stuck in the 90s
The Blindman

Clarkson

I killed Yr Lover

Good living 'sets the tone' for the album. It's bright, aspirational, brimming with harmony and a bit wry. The lyrics set up the Scandinavia concept. It allows people to picture the band in their prelapsarian home - an arcadia (the mythical 'scandinavia') - where everything is as the band members like it.

Once people have 'bought in' to the good times, we show them some musical edge with Nondesript. Ultimately, this song is the most difficult to place in the album, as it has a more dancey feel than everything else (except killed your lover). That's why it should come early on. Starting with Good living and then Nondescript sets up two musical poles and the rest of the album can chart the terrain in between.

Foxy is, to my mind, where the band really shows its colours and depth, placing the track here is where the mythical Scandinavians seem to descend from the mountaintop into the cruel realities of the modern world.

Gap year's maudlin tone (musically and lyrically) works well after the difficult lyrical content in Foxy. It is older and wiser, a bit jaded.

But the mythical Scandinavians are full of love too. K-fed show that even in this fallen state - bogus politicians etc - we are capable of mirth.

Case of the kicked in door is a serious mid-album track. The quiet ending is a nice transition into the pensive Blindman.

Clarkson is a final lift, and - after repeated listening - strangely, the most preachy. It works at the end(ish)

Killed your lover is about a duel. After preaching one has to stand up and be counted. It is also good for a fade out. I'm not so sure it needs to be secret.

Whaddaya reckon?

Nadoom

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

RE: about Tom's tracklisting.

From:

Parky (xxxxx@hotmail.co.uk) http://by159w.bay159.mail.live.com/mail/clear.gif

Sent:

07 May 2011 11:10:02

To:

Nadoom; Waz; Tibs

This is interesting Nadim, as I was approaching it from an entirely musical perspective.

My reasoning for Stuck in the 90s opening was that it is an upfront, cards-on-table introduction to Scandinavia. It opens in the familiar key of E major, and the squeal of feedback and distorted opening chord establishes us immediately as an indie-leaning guitar band with an enviable understanding of pop music. This is ultimately what we are I feel; we all grew up on indie rock and have earned our chops in that tradition. What we've done is co-opted various other musical traditions that we like (electro, slick 70s AOR, blue-eyed soul etc) into that conceptual framework. SITN is also a blast- it's exhilarating and over with quickly. Then Foxy, (which I predict will be the critics' favourite) settles into a groove which the listener, disarmed by the opener's ebullience, will happily settle into.

Gap Year is maudlin in tone and draws the listener into shadier harmonic climbs.

Good Living restores the soul to calm. With it's tropical skip and positive chords, it's like a hungover summer's day without the self-loathing. It also begins in D- the dominant to Gap Year's closing G- creating a cadence effect across the two songs.

K-Fed: the cadence effect is developed, as its harmonic centre lies somewhere between the keys of G and D. Rhythmically, it marks a return to the ebullience of SITN, but bearing the trace of Good Living's tropicality and the groove-oriented feel of Foxy.

Case of the kicked in Door: another critics' favourite I feel. It sees the band confidently playing with AOR tropes without tipping into pastiche. I think it's the most emotionally complex song on the album.

Nondescript abruptly interjects here, showing disregard, almost contempt, for the listener's fragile emotional state. It provides a needed shot in the arm, readying the listener for the final furlong.

I think the excess energy of NAA buys us the opportunity to sneak another complex song in here. The Blindman is interesting- the vibes bring a refreshing timbre to the palate.

Clarkson revs up and floors the album through the chequered flag.

Killed Yr Lover is a nice unexpected treat which, like all the best bonus tracks, is no weaker than the rest of the album but markedly different, and thus has the potential for cult appeal.

Somewhere there's a perfect listing that reconciles the lyrical and musical identity of the songs. We'll get there

>>>>>>>>

RE: about Tom's tracklisting.

From:

Tibs (xxxxx@hotmail.co.uk)

Sent:

08 May 2011 08:31:51

To:

Parky; Nadoom; Waz

I’m going to keep these e-mails for the VH1 behind the music episode and for any PHD's on Scandinavian theory. Warrick's is sure to follow, possibly a weighty multi-megabyte download affair :)

I lean towards Tom's philosophy but Nadim yours is certainly thought provoking!

>>>>>>>>

RE: about Tom's tracklisting.

From:

Parky (xxxxxxxx@hotmail.co.uk)

Sent:

09 May 2011 15:17:20

To:

Tibs; Waz

Cc:

Nadoom

Hey all,

More critical thinking:

Warrick, you noted that our awesomeness owes much to our resistance to definition, in particular with regards to genre affiliation. I've given this some thought and have some concerns regarding a couple of song titles and how they contribute to our public image. I worry that some of our titles will lead some listeners to dismiss us as a joke band without giving the tunes their chance. I'm thinking also of potential reviewers- music journalists are generally idiots who can't write very well, don't like music very much and tend to judge cd's by their covers.

One such song is Gap Year. Gap Year is the key refrain in the song, and a logical title. However, following the unfunny youtube 'Gap Yah' phenomenon, it may lead to us being seen as Johnny come lateys to a lame joke, rather than trailblazing postmodernists. Perhaps something like 'Higher Education' (that's lame though) which is more elusive.

Foxy Knoxy- I personally think that 'Foxy' is a better title- it's obviously ironic, and occupies a middleground between the song's central focus (Amanda Knox aka Foxy Knoxy) and the musical/lyrical reference (Jimi Hendrix's Foxy Lady). This gives the song more room I feel, and ensures that the listener engages with it initially without a preconceived idea of its content.


This is just my personal preference (and not one I feel very strongly about either). I like relative obliquity and feel it's worked well for some of the other songs. Eg: Clarkson Drive, is, I think a great title and gives the song more space where a more direct 'Jeremy Clarkson' or even 'Clarkson', because it's not immediately obvious that the song is about Jeremy Clarkson (that realisation will come later). Nondescript American Accents is about an Anglo-yank douchebag but the listener has to work out for themselves who that is. K-Fed is about idiots of K-Fed's calibre, and how much we need them, but K-Fed himself is never mis-en-scene.

Just to reiterate though, this is not a big deal in by mind, and there's a good chance I'm wrong- it has been known.

>>>>>>>>

Shrouded Corpse Bathing While Hip Shaking

If I were asked to define irony I'd say 'it's like if the world's most populous Muslim country's film industry had a tradition of getting a Benetton mix of porn stars into its movies on a regular basis to generate box office hype'.

And then I read that Sasha Grey was in the Indonesian classic 'Shrouded Corpse Bathing While Hip Shaking'. Grey is to porn what David Haye is to boxing and Henry Rollins is to music - their performances are nasty but they're interesting and intelligent (and I mean nasty as in the Nasty Boys not Christina Aguilera).

Grey is something of a pioneer (not many people can boast they're in an industrial noise band, have a Steven soderburgh art film under their belt and drove eminem to suicide) but she's just one in a series of 'adult film' stars who have been in an Indo-horror-porn.


Unfortunately, I couldn't find a clip on YouTube, so check out this classic Scandinavian scene from dumb and dumber:

Saturday 2 July 2011

Nondescript American Accents


Gucci loafers? Check. Impeccably retro postmodern record collection? Check. Nondescript American Accent?